I heard an interesting fact this week at a rabbinical conference I attended on antisemitism.
Fifteen years ago, when Jewish parents were asked whether they would be upset if their son or daughter married someone outside the Jewish faith, a majority answered, ‘Yes.”
But a recent poll indicated that — within today’s Judaism — marrying someone who is not Jewish is no longer a ‘deal breaker.”
Something else is.
Notes one website, ‘Americans are now more likely to marry a spouse of a different religion. But the same cannot be said for politics.”
A recent survey of dating Americans concluded that one-in-10 relationships ends, these days, because of differences in political opinion. And one-in-five relationships suffers significant stress for the same reason.
How far the world has veered from the idea of independent thought. We have become a society of black or white—and in this week’s Torah portion—gold.
It is now 40 days since the Jews have received the 10 Commandments at Mount Sinai. Moses leaves and ascends the mountain to discuss the intricacies of these newly minted commandments with God
These are the oral laws, values and traditions, which we learn from our parents, grandparents and other teachers. They are living extensions of the written law.
But as the Israelites eagerly wait for Moses to return, they become impatient, and a difference of opinion arises. Some say Moses will return on the 40th day. Others believe it will be just after 40 days.
When Moses doesn’t appear ‘on schedule,” the Jews reject all they have witnessed since Egypt. They want something tangible—something they can touch.
So, they donate their gold earrings and other jewelry, and when a smelted golden calf appears, they begin worshipping it.
Over the centuries, our Sages have posed the question: ‘How could this happen? How could they reject God so quickly?”
The Etz Chaim bible commentary offers a possible explanation:
“The people had just come from Egypt where everything, even death, was rendered visible through pyramids and mummies. It was extremely hard for them to grasp the idea that the reality of all is intangible.”
When Moses returns and realizes what is going on, he becomes enraged and smashes the original 10 Commandment tablets.
God also gets angry and threatens to destroy the Jews, with Moses becoming the forefather of a new nation.
But Moses, like any good leader, overcomes his own disappointment and defends the people. While he agrees that the Israelites are indeed a ‘stiff-necked people,” he asks God for a second chance.
Ultimately, God forgives. And later in our tradition, the Golden Calf incident becomes the model for our pleas on Yom Kippur, as we ask God to forgive our shortcomings.
There is something very troubling about how quickly—after witnessing the plagues, the parting of the sea, the giving of the 10 Commandments—the Israelites seek ‘absolutes.”
Can we relate? Are we so different? These days, it can truly feel challenging to be alive. The Israeli/Hamas war has undermined our trust and unsettled our belief in the world as a just and fair place.
We have become victims not only of a barbaric military attack, but also the target of a pre-planned propaganda assault on Israel and Jews everywhere.
The world’s response has not been to consider the murderous manipulations of radical Islam, but rather to embrace the rigidity of stereotypes and ageless antisemitic tropes.
How quickly the world has gravitated to these age-old attitudes. This past week, Brian Mulroney, the former Canadian Prime Minister, passed away. He was 84.
I was never a big fan. He always seemed pre-programmed, stilted and staged. But over the years, he emerged as a fair and just human being — a friend of Israel.
I had the opportunity to interview him in my journalism days, and, while not agreeing with him, I walked away respecting him.
I thought of him this morning, after my daughter called to inform me of his passing.
Thinking of his life and death drew me to contemplating a time when we were able to discuss our differences within a context of respectable disagreement — where we waited for someone to finish their sentence before injecting close minded words and opinions often coined by others.
Jewish tradition discourages us from studying the Torah on our own. We need someone to challenge us — to expose our reality to the reality of others, to pursue a better tomorrow based on the idea that no one person possesses the truth.
In truth, as a new American, I am disturbed by both major political parties. . Too many are stiff-necked, relying on the rigidity of political-party dogma. What’s more, we spend too much time communicating mainly with those who agree with us.
As a speaker at the conference noted: ‘When it comes to discussing what is currently going on in Gaza, we spend more time speaking to those who agree with us, and not with the majority of Americans who are just trying to figure out what is right.”
Social media — with its tweets and sound bites — encourage us to embrace quick answers. These are today’s golden calves, for all that appears shiny is not necessarily true.
Rather we need to engage in thoughtful conversation at a respectful volume, as we explore the complexities of war and politics. This week’s Torah portion encourages us to examine some of our own truths and understand that today’s golden calves are not only physical, but philosophical as well.
For as our tradition teaches, the most direct path to God is not always contained in shades of black, white—and gold.
Perhaps that is why it took so long for Moses to return.
Rather, as our tradition teaches, truth can be realized within the greys of our lives.
For that is where God truly resides.
Shabbat Shalom, v’kol tuv.